Can you say one cheap dirty old bastard???

So I am off to Vegas in March for a work event, the company is staying at Paris where we have a group rate for around $100 per night.

Now for a little history here, I have been to Vegas around 30 times in the past 10 years, I have stayed up and down the strip but my home away from home is the Imperial Palace. The IP is a shit hole, the elevators barely work it smells like old cigarettes throughout the casino and many of the rooms need updating. Now the rooms are all clean, the sheets are clean the towels and such are all clean as well. My theory on staying here is I barely spend time in the room anyways and no one has any right to bitch because it is so cheap if I spend a little more on meals...which rarely happens anyways.

So now the stage is set, I went to book my room for this trip, it is 6 nights, Saturday to Friday. My total room charge is $286.05. Yes that is taxes in for the entire trip. Now how can I justify spending greater than touble that price to stay anywhere else...personally I cannot. Call me crazy, call me an odd duck for not taking advantage of a "better" hotel but when you spend ~6 hours a night sleeping only in the room anyways...who cares...not me that's who.

Like flies on Shit

If someone comes up with a method to prevent fucking flies from gathering in the over head lights where they buzz their sorry asses around for a day or so before dying making it necessary to find a way to remove said light cover and clean the stupid carcasses out, they will be a very rich woman.

Living in the country doesn't help this situation at all but I am so tired of every time I look up I have to start this process again. You would think that after a million years of evolution, these stupid little bastards would have figured out that if you fly into a light you are going to die. You would think they would be smart enough to sit and feast on that little piece of shit or rotting meat and enjoy their short life instead of baking in a hot lamp....but no. They much prefer to fuck with my head. Little bastards.

Now don't get me wrong, flys have their place...no wait, no they are about as useless as my lawn but at least my lawn can look pretty...when it isn't covered in dog shit with flies buzzing around it. Fucking flies.

A time to reflect

Here I sit with a nice warm pussy in my lap watching Live free or die harder and playing Poker while typing this blog and think about the past year....well actually wonder based on an earlier conversation this year if I in fact have ADD...no multi-tasking at it's finest moment is a better term for this. ADD is something that could have been used to describe me for the past 35 years, active is a much better term for what I got. I have been looking through the boxing day sales today and trying to find a second LCD monitor to allow me to better multi-task at my home office PC, if you find a steal, let me know.

Back on topic. This past year has brought many a moments of clarity to my life be it starting the new position with RIM or the various opportunities for travel that has been presented this year. Enjoying old friendships and cultivating new ones. My poker game has gained in skill which I hope to bring back to the live games with upcoming trips to the mecca that Las Vegas provides, damn I am looking forward to it.

It has been a treat of year in 2009 and I fully expect 2010 to be equally gratifying. Disney world for a 4 year olds birthday is certainly going to be a highlight of the year. Likely signing off until the new year or when I have finally made the plunge on a second lcd..

What are you thinking?

So I made the mistake of heading out to the grocery store and liquor store today. Just browsing the shelves of the liquor store actually. I cam across a small bottle of blueberry vodka and said, that would make a great stocking stuffer for my wife. Fortunately for me it was attached to a 750ml bottle of crown royal. What a great fortune for me as well...so I bought it :)

I then ventured into Sobeys (KW grocery chain), the place was a zoo as expected, unbelieveably though the checkout was very efficient for this time of year so I have to give kudos to the Sobeys staff for making my trip a pleasant one.

I then visited our village bakery where they had 2 fresh baked Dutch Peach pies all ready for me ( I had been there earlier in the day and asked and they were just baking them and put 2 aside), nothing like the smell of a fresh baked peach pie...yummy.

Christmas is here which means it is almost over, thank god...if you actually believe there is one...which is another conversation.

Merry Christmas all.

J

Feeling like a rock star!

I had the greatest of pleasures today...this is a clean post so let me start again... My daughters daycare asked if I would volunteer to play Santa (one oh his helpers as he couldn't make it), I purchased a beard and wig as the loaner was nasty, dawned the old but appropriate costume and made my way over to the centre. I didn't know what to expect, figured it would be the range of emotions over there and they didn't disappoint.

The look of pure awe and excitement was something I had never imagined before walking through that door today. The kids were amazing and I was peppered with quesitons from where did you park the reindeer to why are you wearing those things over your boots (they were boot covers that went over your shoes). I was very political and handled all the questions with the appropriate tact but the feeling of energy coming of the kids was unreal. Knowing I could have said you are all getting coal for xmas as you have all been very bad kids and having the room erupt in tears was a power I have never experienced. The smiles made it worth every moment though. If you get the opportunty, I urge you to take it and put a smile on a little boy or girls face today.

Starbucks I officially am no longer a patron of your services!

So when I get around to the actual letter I will be sure to post it as well. Today I had my last beverage from Starbucks. Cost aside for a moment, seriously people how fucking difficult is it to follow directions on packaged hot chocolate mix which you pre-make ahead of time....must be pretty fucking tough.

I have attempted to enjoy the Signature Hot Chocolate, which is supposedly their premium HC, around the world...well Canada, the USA and UK. Everywhere I have gone there has been at least one time where it has been screwed up and watered down.

Now maybe it separates in the storage container and the barista is too clueless to shake the container or turn the mixer enough but I would estimate close to 50% of the drinks I have attempted to enjoy have been sub par. The problem is, they make the damn thing too fucking hot to try it out in the store and since I rarely sit still for more than a minute anyways I am usually on my way or in the car already before I get to taste the watered down beverage and am once again disappointed. Kind of like expecting that great xmas present from your grandparents only to get underpants.

In their defense I have received 2 replacements after complaining after the fact but it doesn't make up for the dozens that have been sub par, some have been so bad that they were un-consumable, this has included Los Angeles, London (UK), NY, Las Vegas and of course the KW area. Seriously people if you cannot do it right, stop offering it in the first place.

As Joe Pesci said in one of the Lethal Weapon movies..."they always fuck you at the drive through..." well they fuck you with extra hot drinks you cannot taste before you leave the store as well.

Adios Starbucks, your welcome for the last couple of years!

Mother nature...you bitch....I beat you.

Yes folks, her cherry has been popped (that will be explained another time) and no she didn't like it. December 2008 I broke down when we moved and bought a snow blower, best god damn invention....EVER!

No sore back, I can blow the fucking white shit across the street if I wanted to...neighbour wouldn't be impressed though, all Winter 2008/2009 no problems, stored for the summer and all is good.

Check the oil last Tuesday all is good and just in time we get snow. Couple of pushes of the primer, pull and she fires up. Blow my driveway, the neighbour, the neighbour beside her... which I had not intended to do but since they just moved in I wasn't paying attention and blew most of my neighbours snow into their driveway so I thought it would be wise. Then came back to the right of our place and did their driveway as well...yes people 30 minutes total time. That's 30 MINUTES.

She thought she could break me, well I say fuck you mother nature, keep it coming you cannot break me bitch!

Diary of a Snow Shoveler

This so used to be me...more to come on this!

December 8:
6:00 PM. It started to snow. The first snow of the season and the wife and I took our cocktails and sat for hours by the window watching the huge soft flakes drift down from heaven. It looked like a Grandma Moses Print. So romantic we felt like newlyweds again. I love snow!

December 9:
We woke to a beautiful blanket of crystal white snow covering every inch of the landscape. What a fantastic sight! Can there be a more lovely place in the Whole World? Moving here was the best idea I've ever had. Shoveled for the first time in years and felt like a boy again. I did both our driveway and the sidewalks. This afternoon the snowplow came along and covered up the sidewalks and closed in the driveway, so I got to shovel again. What a perfect life.

December 12:
The sun has melted all our lovely snow. Such a disappointment. My neighbor tells me not to worry, we'll definitely have a white Christmas. No snow on Christmas would be awful! Bob says we'll have so much snow by the end of winter, that I'll never want to see snow again. l don't think that's possible. Bob is such a nice man. I'm glad he's our neighbor.

December 14:
Snow lovely snow! 8" last night. The temperature dropped to - 20. The cold makes everything sparkle so. The wind took my breath away, but I warmed up by shoveling the driveway and sidewalks. This is the life! The snowplow came back this afternoon and buried everything again. l didn't realize I would have to do quite this much shoveling, but I'll certainly get back in shape this way. I wish I wouldn't huff and puff so.

December 15:
20 inches forecast. Sold my van and bought a 4x4 Blazer. Bought snow tires for the wife's car and 2 extra shovels. Stocked the freezer. The wife wants a wood stove in case the electricity goes out. I think that's silly. We aren't in Alaska, after all.

December 16:
Ice storm this morning. Fell on my ass on the ice in the driveway putting down salt. Hurt like hell. The wife laughed for an hour, Which I think was very cruel.

December 17:
Still way below freezing. Roads are too icy to go anywhere. Electricity was off for 5 hours. I had to pile the blankets on to stay warm. Nothing to do but stare at the wife and try not to irritate her. Guess I should've bought a wood stove, but won't admit it to her. God I hate it when she's right. I can't believe I'm freezing to death in my own living room.

December 20:
Electricity's back on, but had another 14" of the damn stuff last night. More shoveling. Took all day. Goddamn snowplow came by twice. Tried to find a neighbor kid to shovel, but they said they're too busy playing hockey. I think they're lying. Called the only hardware store around to see about buying a snow blower and they're out. Might have another shipment in March. I think they're lying. Bob says I have to shovel or the city will have it done and bill me. I think he's lying.

December 22:
Bob was right about a white Christmas because 13 more inches of the white shit fell today, and it's so cold it probably won't melt till August. Took me 45 minutes to get all dressed up to go out to shovel and then I had to piss. By the time I got undressed, pissed and dressed again. I was too tired to shovel. Tried to hire Bob who has a plow on his truck for the rest of the winter; but he says he's too busy. I think the asshole is lying.

December 23:
Only 2" of snow today. And it warmed up to 0. The wife wanted me to decorate the front of the house this morning. What is she, nuts?!?! Why didn't she tell me to do that a month ago? She says she did but I think she's lying.

December 24:
6". Snow packed so hard by snowplow, l broke the shovel. Thought I was having a heart attack. If I ever catch the son of a bitch who drives that snowplow, I'll drag him through the snow by his balls. I know he hides around the corner and waits for me to finish shoveling and then he comes down the street at a 100 miles an hour and throws snow all over where I've just been! Tonight the wife wanted me to sing Christmas carols with her and open our presents, but I was busy watching for the goddamn snowplow.

December 25:
Merry Christmas. 20 more inches of the slop tonight. Snowed in. The idea of shoveling makes my blood boil. God I hate the snow! Then the snowplow driver came by asking for a donation and I hit him over the head with my shovel. The wife says I have a bad attitude. I think she's an idiot. If I have to watch "It's a Wonderful Life" one more time, I'm going to kill her.

December 26:
Still snowed in. Why the hell did I ever move here? It was all HER idea. She's really getting on my nerves.

December 27:
Temperature dropped to -30 and the pipes froze.

December 28:
Warmed up to above -50. Still snowed in. THE BITCH is driving me crazy!!!!!

December 29:
10 more inches. Bob says I have to shovel the roof or it could cave in. That's the silliest thing I ever heard. How dumb does he think I am?

December 30:
Roof caved in. The snow plow driver is suing me for a million dollars. The wife went home to her mother. 9" predicted.

December 31:
Set fire to what's left of the house. No more shoveling.

January 8:
I feel so good. I just love those little white pills they keep giving me. Why am I tied to the bed?

WTF is with the teens and lack of service skills these days?

Fuck me, I must have been invisible today.

Canadian Tire, I have a socket, bottle of washer fluid and shovel and walk up to the register where the girl is counting CDN tire money. She looks up and back down at her money, the look was almost like she was saying, fuck me another customer great.

I am holding the shovel as I know she needs to scan the bottom and if I lean it bottom up it is going to end up on the ground anyways, what does the bitch do but A. Not even acknowledge me standing there but scans the other 2 items on the counter first then the shovel which by this time is almost wrapped around her scrawny fucking neck. I hand her my CC and finally she says something, "Is there a chip in that?" No there is no fucking chip, take the card and fuck off. I sign the bill and finally another word..."goodbye".

Go to McD's for a quick dinner...well pardon fucking me for showing up at dinner time when you are busy. 8 minutes through the drive through....well done. Anyways to the point, I get to the cash window and have my hand out the window with cash, dude finishes taking the order before he opens the window which I can forgive him for, NO hello, just "Seven forty-eight" No it's not 7:58 you stupid fuck, it's 7:30 but here is $10 anyways...douche. Then a little piece of tail comes up and starts talking to him as he is slowly and I mean slowly, my 4 year old could have made change faster, he starts acknowledging her and literally is looking at her as he is reaching out the window, no $2.42 is your change, no thank you, no good night...I should have grabbed his hand and pulled the little basterd out the window. I say thanks and move to the next window...which he didn't acknowledge the thanks...fucker. Food comes this girl actually acknowledged my existance, like I said it was 8 minutes anyways but that is another issue.

This coupled with the shitty Signature Hot Chocolate I have been getting lately at Starbucks has once again proven there is no respect or committment to actually provide a service these days. Someone step up and straighten these kids out...there has to be an old bastard like me working for these companies that knows this bullshit is going on.....maybe not!

Trials and tribulations of continuing to deal with the morons that are called Bell Canada

This pretty much says it all. If they ever wonder why they are loosing money they should really look at how their business is run.

info: A chat representative will be with you in about 0 minute(s). Thank you for waiting.
info: Chat representative Sam has joined the session and is ready to help. To start, please provide your name and home phone number.
Sam: Hello and welcome to Bell's chat service. How may I provide you with excellent service today?
No thanks. : Hello Sam, Account number 123456789
No thanks. : The service was cancelled as we moved to Rogers a couple of weeks ago, can you tell me why I am being billed for the entire month of July?
Sam: Hello!
Sam: I am sorry to hear that.
Sam: I will be happy to assist you.
Sam: May I have your first name and last name?
No thanks. : John Storozuk
Sam: May I call you by your first name?
No thanks. : yes
Sam: Thank you, John.
Sam: May I have your Bell Home Phone number starting with the area code?
No thanks. : 5199999999
No thanks. : Account number was given above
Sam: Yes, thank you.
Sam: Let me pull up your records.
Sam: I have checked your records and I see that you have cancelled your telephone line on July 04, 2009.
No thanks. : Yes...so why am I being billed until the end of July?
Sam: Your billing cycle goes for a month in advance.
Sam: You will get the credits applied on your next billing cycle for the unused days.
No thanks. : Credit? You mean Bell is going to send me a cheque?
No thanks. : the account is being cancelled, does it make sense to pay you for a full months service when there was 4 days usage and then have you give me a credit. That doesn't make any business sense.
No thanks. : Hello?
Sam: Yes, I certainly understand.
Sam: You will get the credit via check once you pay for the full month.
No thanks. : Well that isn't going to happen. I will divide my bill by 30 and multiply that by 7 (giving you a buffer) and pay that amount. What happens then?
Sam: I am sorry, you will have the late payment fees applied to your account.
Sam: John, are you satisfied with the support and information that I have offered?
No thanks. : No I am not satisified. You are going to charge me a late payment when you will still owe me money? That doesn't add up
No thanks. : Think about it for a second Sam, does that make sense to you? You as a person not you as Bell Canada.
Sam: I am sorry, your billing cycle goes for July 1, 2009 - July 31, 2009.
Sam: You will certainly get the credits applied on your next billing cycle.
Sam: Is there anything else I can help you with today?
Sam: I have not received a response from you. Do you wish to continue this chat session?
No thanks. : Yes I would like to know my per day fee is. I am not paying you the full amount, this WILL go to collections and Bell will be out of the actual owed amount based on the collection fee alone, does this make sense?
Sam: I am sorry, we don't have sufficient information regarding this, I advice you to pay the amount as it is printed on the bill.
No thanks. : Lol, you must be an automated system and are not hearing me.
Sam: I will only be able to advice you to pay an amount that is being printed on the bill.
Sam: I am sorry you felt that way.
Sam: I am a live person.
Sam: I will not be able to tell you an approximate amount.
Sam: I am sorry!
No thanks. : It is these types of responses I have continued to get from dealing with Bell canada that have caused me to move. I have been a loyal customer for many years, you can look at my record and see pretty much flawless payment history and this is how it is going to end... so be it I guess. You can tell your supervisor they can see me at the collections office.
Sam: I appreciate your loyalty with Bell.
Sam: I do understand that you have being a loyal customer with Bell and we appreciate that.
Sam: I suggest you to pay the complete bill to avoid any late payment fees.
Sam: It's been a pleasure helping you today! Remember, you can use Bell.ca Self-Serve at any time.
Sam: Thank you for choosing Bell.
Sam: Have a great day!

Surprises abound

Customer service is something that for the most part has gone the way of the dodo it would seem. The recent example of our friend Ma Bell proof in point. What a nice surprise we experienced when we took our 2008 Caravan into the shop for some work the other day.

We had it in a few weeks ago for a noise in the back end, turns out our right rear caliper was seizing, something that is a known issue and the parts were on back order. Well I noticed on our oil change sticker they said our brakes needed replacement as well.

We bought the vehicle used from Bustard back in Jan so I was a bit surprised at this and questioned the service person when I made the appt if the seized calipre would cause break wear, she said she didn't know blah blah. Well working in the industry for 3 years I know what GM would have said...it's a wear item and is not covered. Well my wife went to pick up the van and not only did they fix the calipre, they also replaced the rear brakes at no charge.

My jaw hit the floor, Chrysler you just moved up a few knotches in my book thanks for the service.

J

Another one for the WTF category

http://gizmodo.com/5308413/disturbing-billboard-bleeds-when-it-rains?autoplay=true

Click the link and enjoy the billboard that crys blood....

And people wonder why Bell telephone is in the shitter

I was chatting with Bell a few weeks back about why I want to stay with them and not bounce to Rogers Home Phone, this tops one of the dumbest conversations with a tech person in a while.

A chat representative will be with you in about 0 minute(s). Thank you for waiting.
Chat representative Paul has joined the session and is ready to help. To start, please provide your name and home phone number.
Paul: Hello and welcome to Bell's chat service. How may I provide you with excellent service today?
You: Hi Paul. John Storozuk xxx-xxx-xxxx (I gave him my phone number)
Paul: May I call you by your first name?
You: Sure Can. Real easy question, Why should I stay with Bell when I can move to Rogers for a pretty good discount.
Paul: Thank you, John.
You: And I understand if you need to redirect me to another team
Paul: Is this for your home phone account?
Paul: I have not received a response. Do you wish to continue this chat session?
You: Sorry yes my home phone
Paul: Bell welcomes competition and recognizes that it benefits consumers. We further realize that our society is becoming increasingly dependent on technologies and fortunately, Bell has reliable systems second to none. Here are a few reasons why I think Bell is the best choice for your local and telecommunication needs:
Paul: - Bell offers quality, experience, honesty and reliability. Our network availability is 99.999% reliable. We've been here for 125 years and we'll continue to be of service to our customers and our community
Paul: - Bell contributes to the growth of our communities and country through taxes, employment, corporate sponsorship, funding many local programs such as minor sports, junior achievement and the arts
Paul: I can assist you to make your home phone bills low if you wish.
You: I would be saving about $20 per month moving to Rogers which is a pretty good savings, it is all good that Bell is warm and fuzzy to the community but lets see what you can do to my wallet
Paul: Can I have your account number please?
You: 1 min
You: 123456789
Paul: Thank you.
Paul: I do see that you have a basic phone line with a long distance plan and a calling feature.
Paul: Home Phone Lite includes unlimited local calling, a free directory listing and 1 free calling feature for 3 months.
Paul: http://www.bell.ca/shopping/PrsShpPns_wirelinePackages_Lite.page
Paul: For more information or to order please click on the link below:
You: So how does this save me any money?
Paul: The plans charge will be $22.95.
You: It would appear that after 3 months I am actualy paying more than I am now
Paul: Then you will have a charge of $2.80 for Touch Tone and $0.19 for E911.
Paul: You have a long distance plan which wil cost you $13.90.
Paul: Yes.
Paul: It is the cheapest plan which Bell offers.
You: Lol, ok so currently I am paying less than this new plan will be in 3 months is that correct?
Paul: Yes, you are correct!
You: ok so that is not much help then.
Paul: I am so sorry that you feel this way.
Paul: If you are in 12 months contract with Bell you can receive $5.00 discounts for 6 months.
Paul: If you are in 24 months contract with Bell you can receive $5.00 discounts for 12 months.
You: It is not that I feel this way, it is fact, nothing to do with feelings at this stage. A 5.00 discount to be locked into a contract for 2 years is not much help either. Guess you made my decision for me. Thank you for the information Paul.
Paul: Please do understand that Bell provides quality services.
Paul: You're welcome.


UM....duh... so needless to say as of today we are now a Rogers home phone customer. Keep you posted as to how that works out.

Head games

Sadly I have to admit that mowing the lawn was actually a rather relaxing process last week, I rather enjoyed myself. Now I will not go out on a limb and say that I would do this every day but I certainly found it relaxing hearing nothing but the wurr of the mower all while getting a little exercize.

On to bigger and better things, I am a true believer in karma, call it do unto others as you would have them do to you, call it don't shit where you eat, call it love thy neighbour...just not thy neighbours wife, call it whatever you like it is an interesting phenomenom. Our neighbour is a lovely 65+something lady who lives alone in a rather large bungalow, this past winter I would always make it a point that when I finished snow blowing my driveway I would pop over and do hers if I had time. It would take me 15 minutes and save her 2 hours. I didn't mind, I was bundled anyways so why not. She would always come out on the porch and thank me or grab her shovel and do her walk. What a nice surprise today when there is a knock at the door and she apologizes and says that she is embarassed it has taken her this long to drop this by and hands me a card, she says thank you very much so I say your welcome for whatever and she goes on her way. Here she was thoughtful enough to give us a Timmy's gift card for $25.

I had no expectation and what a plesant surprise it was, kind of made up for the way the day has gone. It is really good to see there are still some decent folks in the world. Thanks Edith, I appreciate your thoughtfullness.


PS. Got my latest batch of Saxx underpants in..woohoo, 3 more days in the week for the boys to enjoy that which is Saxx.

Hot... Damn Hot....

Yes summer has arrived and in the typical SW Ontario style the humidity rolled in right along with it. As the saying in Good Morning Vietnam says "Hot, damn hot, hot enough to cook things in your shorts... a little crotch pot cooking" Yes that is what it felt like today.

BUT

Yes ladies and gentlemen I had my Saxx briefs on which kept things in their place and rather comfortable. Actually I was very surprised at this fact about how well these things actually worked and truly made me a believer.

I digress (must come from my mothers side)

I arrive home and find that both of my neighbors have cut their grass. What this means is I now have to bow to the almighty, yes mother nature, and follow suit. I have a rechargable electric mower with a lawn twice the size of my old one, this will be an adventure. Stay tuned for the cursing if it takes me 2 days.

Website is updated

If you are in the need to know then consider yourself told.

To poke a hole and keeping the lawn trimmed

Say what you will but there is something to poking holes and keeping the lawn trimmed, you never know when you will end up in an ambulance with dirty underpants.

Yes folks it is true, tomorrow the posts for my fence get placed hopefully permanently in the holes that will also be dug for them, this is an exciting time for all involved. The fence is going to be ~230 linear feet, consisting of 6x6 posts, 2x6 cross beams sandwiching the fence boards, it is going to look beautiful and yes I will toot my own horn.

Now you ask what does this have to do with keeping pubic hair trimmed or wearing clean underpants...well nothing really but you should take things...never know when you will be lying there an saying to yourself..damn I am sweating like the hoover dam down there, I should have mowed the lawn a little bit to keep things cool.

Another post brought down to the gutter, and another 60 seconds of your life you will not get back, got ya again.

gnite!

Don't go there....

Alright, this has been on my mind for a couple of weeks. I don't know where I heard this or read this but it did get me thinking.

Why is it that the North American culture is so hung up on the 4 letter C word. It is vulger I will admit but there are times when it truly describes the fundamental problem with the intended recipient. That said the contrary to this is "Mother F&*&$r", if you really think about it this is far more insulting and yet it is so much more common. Is it bad...well yes and if you think about it literally it is certainly far worse than calling someone a C>>> and yet the C word still seems worse.

Lets thrown in Douchebag into the mix...that is just pretty bad, I could make the arguement being called a DB just seems to dig that much more than MF and well ranks up with with a C but certainly isn't looked at in the same light.

Moron, Putz, DB, Asshole, dipshit, shithead, f*(%head,MF, C, all end up describing a stupid person but depending on who is telling the story or calling said name varies the level of stupidness said person is exhibiting.

Lets take this post for example, you have just spent about a minute or so of your life that you will never ever get back. If you are 89 with half your torso already in the ground that 1:30 means a lot and you are probably calling me a C for wasting your precious time. Now if you are 30 and reading this, although you are reading the same words Moron is probably the better descriptor you have for me now.

See what I mean, it all means the same thing just a different sensation and as terrible MF is and repulsive using the C word is you all know exactly what I am talking about and if you haven't already will likely use one or both of those to describe someone in your lifetime.

PS. Sorry about the 1:30, I lost even more in the creation of this mindless post.

Random Nothingness

Today was a good day. My DW's cousins littlest one Ellie turns 1 tomorrow (happy bday Ellie) so we were invited to her 1st birthday in London. After dance and lunch we packed up and made the trek west. The pool was a mere 88 so very comfortable and Neve had much fun jumping off the diving board and swimming to the edge to do it all over again. She has become quite the fish for a 4 year old. She certainly swims better than I did at her age and I must say I was quite a swimmer.

We then had a nice dinner of pizza and random salads followed by Jill's cake. Jillian is someone from my past that I worked with many moons ago who happens to be a very good friend of my DW's cousin...and she makes the best cake anyone could ask for. I don't do desserts....well never used to but find myself indulging more lately....but when Jill makes a cake....mmmmm.

I also ordered the posts for our fence yesterday. They get posted on Wednesday of next week...yippee a backyard is in the near future woohoo.... not really looking forward to many weeks of manual labour but the dogs and kid will like it.

Finally off to a family reunion tomorrow for my DW's step mom after pictures at dance class, I can hardly contain my excitement.

Later.

How could I forget

Underwear

Yes I think I have found the greatest thing since sliced bread...in fact it takes much of the design concept from sliced bread. Saxx Apparel - Underwear to be specific. Looking for that perfect gift for the man in your life this is it.

The concept is simple, the twig and giggle berries need room to breath, these underwear basically give the man tool it's own room so they no longer rest against ones legs. The end result, breathing room, less sweaty sticky man juice which just does no one any good.

Seriously your man will love you for them, at $30 a pop they are pricey but well worht it. Check them out http://www.saxxapparel.com/

Welcome to 2009

It may be 6 months late but I finally caught up with myself and got around to posting my first blog entry. This is going to comprised of random thoughts, strange happenings and pretty much anything else that I feel the need to write about at said given moment.

Yes you may even find a poem or 2 that has been rattling around in my tiny brain but all in all at the end of the day it is stuff I need to get out of my head.

Now that that's out, welcome to my random stupidness. A little about me, I am a 30 x'r married man with a beautiful daughter living in a small village in Ontario Canada. I work for a high tech company pretty much everyone has heard about and have been with them for 8+ years. Currently part of the security product management team (responsible for the security of our product, specifically it doesn't put you at risk). My job takes me to many different places to see and do many different things and frankly I love it.

I am a pretty decent golfer, and love being on the water kiteboarding (google it!). I also enjoy Vegas at every chance I can get, specifically hanging at the IP poker room. I have an amazing wife and as mentioned a beautiful daghter whom I love both very much. Lastly I am currently working through my CS degree through distance ed with Athabasca University. Yes much on my plate.

That is about all I have for my first entry, with this I will leave you with a little poem. I don't know the original author, but I believe it came from a book I read as a kid, Larry Wilde - The Official Book of Sick Jokes.

I wish I had your picture,
It would be very nice!
I would hang it in the attic,
To scare away the mice.

g'Nite!