Sunday, July 5, 2009

And people wonder why Bell telephone is in the shitter

I was chatting with Bell a few weeks back about why I want to stay with them and not bounce to Rogers Home Phone, this tops one of the dumbest conversations with a tech person in a while.

A chat representative will be with you in about 0 minute(s). Thank you for waiting.
Chat representative Paul has joined the session and is ready to help. To start, please provide your name and home phone number.
Paul: Hello and welcome to Bell's chat service. How may I provide you with excellent service today?
You: Hi Paul. John Storozuk xxx-xxx-xxxx (I gave him my phone number)
Paul: May I call you by your first name?
You: Sure Can. Real easy question, Why should I stay with Bell when I can move to Rogers for a pretty good discount.
Paul: Thank you, John.
You: And I understand if you need to redirect me to another team
Paul: Is this for your home phone account?
Paul: I have not received a response. Do you wish to continue this chat session?
You: Sorry yes my home phone
Paul: Bell welcomes competition and recognizes that it benefits consumers. We further realize that our society is becoming increasingly dependent on technologies and fortunately, Bell has reliable systems second to none. Here are a few reasons why I think Bell is the best choice for your local and telecommunication needs:
Paul: - Bell offers quality, experience, honesty and reliability. Our network availability is 99.999% reliable. We've been here for 125 years and we'll continue to be of service to our customers and our community
Paul: - Bell contributes to the growth of our communities and country through taxes, employment, corporate sponsorship, funding many local programs such as minor sports, junior achievement and the arts
Paul: I can assist you to make your home phone bills low if you wish.
You: I would be saving about $20 per month moving to Rogers which is a pretty good savings, it is all good that Bell is warm and fuzzy to the community but lets see what you can do to my wallet
Paul: Can I have your account number please?
You: 1 min
You: 123456789
Paul: Thank you.
Paul: I do see that you have a basic phone line with a long distance plan and a calling feature.
Paul: Home Phone Lite includes unlimited local calling, a free directory listing and 1 free calling feature for 3 months.
Paul: For more information or to order please click on the link below:
You: So how does this save me any money?
Paul: The plans charge will be $22.95.
You: It would appear that after 3 months I am actualy paying more than I am now
Paul: Then you will have a charge of $2.80 for Touch Tone and $0.19 for E911.
Paul: You have a long distance plan which wil cost you $13.90.
Paul: Yes.
Paul: It is the cheapest plan which Bell offers.
You: Lol, ok so currently I am paying less than this new plan will be in 3 months is that correct?
Paul: Yes, you are correct!
You: ok so that is not much help then.
Paul: I am so sorry that you feel this way.
Paul: If you are in 12 months contract with Bell you can receive $5.00 discounts for 6 months.
Paul: If you are in 24 months contract with Bell you can receive $5.00 discounts for 12 months.
You: It is not that I feel this way, it is fact, nothing to do with feelings at this stage. A 5.00 discount to be locked into a contract for 2 years is not much help either. Guess you made my decision for me. Thank you for the information Paul.
Paul: Please do understand that Bell provides quality services.
Paul: You're welcome.

UM....duh... so needless to say as of today we are now a Rogers home phone customer. Keep you posted as to how that works out.


  1. wow. I think MORON sums it up nicely.

  2. I am SO GLAD to know that I am not the only one in this family, besides your father, that deals with stupid people.